In the the world is today there is an entitlement mentality going around. So what is the entitlement mentality, essentially it is people who walk around thinking that the world owes them something and that they have to put in little to no effort to get what they feel they are owed.
The people who think that it is other people’s job to provide for them, to pay their bills, to manage their life, give them a job, or to take care of them. And the key is that they do not want to work for it. There just expect it and if they do not get what they feel other people owe them, then they blame the other people instead of putting the blame where it belongs and that is on themselves.
If there is anything that I have learned, it is that the world owes you nothing. You need to work hard because no one is going to give you anything. Understand that no one is just going to hand you your ideal life just because you’re you and you want it really really bad. Understand that with every hardship it is up to you to navigate through life and to work your way out of it. Understand that you can’t complain about what people are not doing for you because it is not their job to do anything for you.
I have to cut off friends for thinking that it was my responsibility as their friend to give them money for their rent or their bills. And all of what I just said is what the entitled mentality is. Now do not get me wrong, I do believe that we should help people, but my help comes to those who are open and willing to help themselves. I have never asked a friend to pay my bills. I never saw their friendship as a condition of providing for me. I do not go around asking people to borrow money or to give me a handout. And if I need a favor and they are unwilling to do it, I can never get mad at them for that. It is not their responsibility to do anything for me! Just like it is no one responsibility to do anything for you. And understand that if any chooses to do something for you, they are doing it because they want to; not because they have to. And you should be thankful and appreciative for what they did for you.
In the counseling field we have something called resilience.
It is defined as an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.
Resilience is the basic component that separates weather you are able to bounce back or whether you are able to let your misfortune to overcome you. To form resilience you must face some type of hardship. But the true formation of resilience comes when you are able to bounce back from that hardship and learn from it. You can never form resilience if you are always expecting other people to get you out if your hardship.
I know what you may be saying
“But Sophia, aren’t you a Christian? Is not our duty to help those in need?”
To that question I answer yes and no. Let’s take Ruth for example.
“So Ruth worked alongside the women in Boaz’s fields and gathered grain with them until the end of the barley harvest. Then she continued working with them through the wheat harvest in early summer. And all the while she lived with her mother-in-law.” Ruth 2:23
The key lessons that we take from Ruth (also read my blog here for more lessons on Ruth), was that she went out in the field and work her butt off in order to get food. Boaz saw Ruth working hard and that is when he decided to help her. She never expected for anyone to do anything for her. Boaz made provisions for her in which she was thankful. Stating
“Ruth fell at his feet and thanked him warmly. ‘What have I done to deserve such kindness?’ she asked. ‘I am only a foreigner.’” Ruth 2:10
Never once did she tell Boaz that she waiting for him to give her something because she was poor and did not have any food. She did what she had to do and I am convince that no matter if Boaz made provisions for her or not she would have kept handling her business. That is a difference between a handout and a hand up. A hand up is someone feeling compelled to help you because you are helping yourself. A handout is when someone is giving you something for free because you expect it from them.
Most successful people are made of people who receive a handup and not a handout. Get Out Get Up And Get Something (see my blog here). Do not have the entitlement mentality. Do not sit and expect money to come falling out of the sky to change your situation. No one owes you a future, a life, or success. You owe it to yourself to get those things. You feel me? Glad You Do.