A few years back when I was in my Master’s program, myself and a couple of friends went to Hooters to get something to eat. While we were there I ran into some guys, one guy in particular, were we talked and he bought me a drink. About an hour and a half later two other students from my Master’s program walked in, and the guy that I was talking to, his attention quickly went to her. He kept complimenting how beautiful she was, how wonderful she look, her skin, and her hair. RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. Literally I was sitting right next to him. He noticed her so much that he forget that I was sitting right there.
It was then that I learned a valuable lesion. No matter how pretty you are there is always someone prettier. Other similar lessons would come to me in my PhD program. Among many of my friends I am the most educated and often times the most well-read. Making me look the smartest. But among other PhD students, I am at the bottom of the totem pole. Many of them are smarter than me. And then again I learned a valuable lesson. No matter how smart you think you are, there is always someone smarter. The basic lesson that can be learned from all of this is no matter how good you think you are at something there is going to be someone better.
I know what you are thinking. Where is this post going, because I am depressing you telling you that there is someone out there better than you?
Well even though there is always going to be someone better than you are at something. They are not you and what you have can be different from what they have. Let’s go back to the example at Hooters. After “the guy” began coming on to this other girl right in front of my face. I had a “who cares” moment (read my blog here on the who cares girl). I did not fight for his attention. I did not get mad at her nor did I get mad at him. If he could not see how awesome I was and wanted her then let him go over there to her. Because knowing that someone may be prettier than me does not mean that I am going to think less about myself.
Take the second example with my fellow PhD students. While I have been struggling in certain areas, they have been excelling. In this case I did not have a “who cares” moments. I had an “I am going to light the fire under my butt moment.” At the end of the day, even though they are smarter than me. I know for fact that I would be willing to worker harder, read more, to catch up to where they were. I did not let the fact that I did not know as much at them defeat me. I allowed it to motivate me.
The other day I read an interesting quote by a celebrity:
“There are a lot of people out there who may be more talented than me, may be better looking than me, they may be stronger, taller and faster than me, but they’re not going to work harder than me.” –Terrence J
I feel his sentiments. I am not the most perfect person. Not the prettiest, not the smartest, do not make the most money. But one thing I can guarantee is that I am focused, I am a hard worker, and I am going to get to where I need to be. AND I am willing to move heaven and Earth to get what I want out of life.
So although I may not be the best, I am still going to come out on top because I willing to work at it. I am willing to see my weaknesses and make them stronger. Which is something a lot of people are not willing to do.
So if you are one of those people who are always down on yourself because someone is always doing something better than you. The world has billions of people in it so whatever talent you have, there is someone that is going to be better at that talent than you. BUT, they are not you. You have to find a way to take what you do have and bring it to life. Do you think that Taylor Swift or Beyoncé are the best singers in the world? No they are not. I can name plenty of people that are better singers than them. But it is the traits that make up who they are as a person that makes them good at what they do. And all of their individual traits cannot be replicated. So in essence they are good at being themselves and no one can beat them at that.