Other people’s problems can rub off on you if let it. Whenever we have an issue of trust, jealousy, or any type of negative
emotion we must reflect on where it comes from. Because it stems from somewhere. And most of the times it stemmed from other people’s problems and someone their problems caused you to form your own problems. I also talk about this in my accept the things you cannot chance blog click here to read.
How other people’s problems because your problems typically stems from what other people told you about yourself or simply from observing other people’s dysfunction has made you think that dysfunction is normal.
When people come against us, whatever issue in them has also stemmed from some where. More than likely from other people. So if they get their issues from somewhere else and then you get your issues from them, it is the same cycle happening again and again. Each person affecting one another causing each person to develop their own set of problems.
People get jealous of you because you have something they do not have (click here to read my blog on jealousy). It may not mean that they are a bad person per se, what it means is that they have so much jealousy in them, and that it consumes them as a person and makes them act out their insecurities on other people. Often times they do not even know why nor are they even aware of it. And if you are not able to deal with it effectively, then their jealousy issue now becomes your issue and then you develop your own set of issues. You will start to become paranoid that everyone is against you or you may retaliate against them for being jealous against you.
This is what happened to me in regards to trust. I developed trust issues because of people who abused my trust. My mistrust issues developed into something deeper. I started to feel that I feel that I was the only person that I could trust, because I know that I will not let me down.
But that mentality heightened my insecurities and separated me from people… ALL people. Even the ones that wanted to help me. Through my misguided attempt to be strong and not lean on anyone, I have put this same mentality on other people.
Then my distrust started to spill over into my spiritual life. I have always had a great relationship with God but then I had a hard time trusting him (click here to read my blog on trusting God). Because of my distrust issue with people, I felt that way toward God. It got to a point that I did not want to pray and ask for anything, because if I did not get it, then I felt that God has let me down. Which would lead me to seeing God like everyone else that has let me down. ALL these stemmed from how PEOPLE trained me. My mistrust spilled over into other areas of my life to including my spiritual life.
How many people can relate?
Have you been hurt, abandoned, or abused by other people? That you rather go about things on your own and struggle over asking for help? Because you do not want to give the other person the opportunity shut you down?
Has someone told you, you were ugly, fat, or never would amount to anything? Has other people told you something about yourself so much now you believe it?
Do you see how other people’s issues or problems with you has not become your issues and now you have your own set of problems to deal with. The first thing you need to do is to be able to recognize where this comes from. Was it your mother that used to put you down, a boyfriend a sibling, or a friend? Did someone abuse or neglect you as a child? We you so used to growing up in an angry household that now you are an angry person?
That is not the person you were meant to be. That is the person that other people’s issues made you into. The sooner you recognize where it comes from the better you can learn how to deal with it. And the way to deal with it is to find your own self and develop your own identity. When you are secure in yourself and who you are as a person, then you will not be so quick to believe other people when they tell you something about yourself. You will not absorb their issues Do not let other’s people’s issues, opinion of you, or how people have treated to you shape the way you feel about yourself. The second thing you need to do it to not be afraid to cut other people out of your life. You can forgive from a distance (see my blog here). If someone else’s problems is causing you problems it is better to let them go then let them continue to corrupt you.