I have been celibate for a couple of years now (click here to read why). I remember becoming celibate was tugging on my heart for a long time before I actually became celibate. And even during the course of me trying to be celibate I messed up many times. It was not until I made up my mind that I was going to be celibate until I got married that I was able to really stick to it. I am not virgin by any means, I do have a son. So unless I got impregnated by the Holy Spirit it is safe to say I have had sex before.
I am not going to get too much, into why I stopped having sex because I do have a blog on that. But more so how I maintain my celibacy.
Don’t put yourself in bad situations.
Like I said before I tried to be celibate so many times. But the times that I ended up messing up is because I put myself in a situation where I could mess up. So just so we are clear some of the things that you should stay clear of are:
- A Netflix and chill night. Unless you have a group of people around you.
- Spending the night over each other’s house.
- Laying in the bed together.
- Getting drunk around each other that may compromise your decision-making.
- Going over each other’s house late at night.
I know it can sound like you cannot do anything. But if you put yourself in these positions, you need to be strong enough to face the temptation. And if you are not strong enough then you will mess up time and time again. So that is why just don’t put yourself in that position. If you want to be celibate, you have to be intentional about it. So do not lie to yourself saying you can just lay in the bed and cuddle…naked, knowing that it will lead to sex.
Find someone with similar beliefs.
If you are celibate and the man keeps trying to have sex with you or talks dirty to you all the time. He is not helping anything and eventually he will wear you down. If someone is not supportive of you abstaining from sex then you need to question if it is meant for you to be with that person. Your body is your own, you should not be pressured by anyone to have sex if you don’t want to.
God was the one that convicted me to be celibate in the first place. And it is prayer that helps me stay that way. God is going to talk to you about it and remind you why He wanted you to become celibate on. God will also remove any temptation that you may be having will you feel you may slip up.
Look Up Horror Stories and STD’s
So this may sound insane, but it works for me. The last thing I want to do is get an STD or something I cannot get rid of. So whenever you are tempted look up pictures of STD’s or stories about how people contracted AIDS, and it will be a reminder that your life is not worth playing Russian roulette with. That there are too many diseases going on in this world for you to just give yourself up freely. That is better to be with the person you marry for the rest of your life than it is to sleep with someone who may not be around a few months later.