To listen to the blog post “Single at 30? How To Keep Hope Alive” over reading it just click the play button below
Are you single at 20? I was once you and even though you may be upset, ready to have a nervous break, or you just feel like an old maid I want to give you some encouragement so that you can understand that being 30 and single is really not as devastating as you may think. And before we get into the post, check out my video on being single at 30 below, and don’t forget to subscribe to my channel by clicking here.
1. Single At 30 ~ Is There Still Hope?
Yes, there is still hope. You are not dead for God’s sake you are 30 and your life is nowhere near over. In fact, there are actually some really good things about getting married older. After a certain age, women tend to have a higher level of emotional maturity. You have a wider range of experiences to evaluate a potential mate (Source).
In any case, if you really think about your 20’s you will probably come to find out that you may not have been ready to get married in the first place even if you think that you were. In fact, now that I sit back and reflect on my 20’s I am glad that I got everything out of my system in my 20’s, I dated, and I found out what I truly like.
And I know for a fact back then I really did not know myself. Do not be in such a rush to get married, 30 is really not that old and yes there is still hope. And because me saying it is probably not enough, check out these bride’s stories who got married in their 30’s.
"I waited to get married for a few reasons. I had gone through a tough failed engagement at the age of 31 that made me reevaluate what I wanted my future to look like. From there, I quickly took the reigns on my career, moving up to a senior-level position at one of the world's leading PR firms. My parents had taught me to be strong and business-minded and to never stop pursuing my dreams for a man. So, I continued pursuing my dreams and happened to meet the perfect guy along the way. Aside from meeting the man of my dreams, I am glad I waited until my 30s because I feel that I am teaching my daughters a valuable lesson. I was able to accomplish my own dreams, live without any regrets, and provide my family with a financially comfortable life because I worked on establishing myself in my career first." —Lori, married at 38
Also, check out my video below on why you should chase the purpose and not the man, and when you do the main will come.
"My now-husband and I actually met in our mid-20s. But soon after, I got 'the call.' He liked spending time with me, but he wasn't ready for a relationship. So it ended there. But because we worked in the same career field, we continued to see one another at industry events. This went on for seven years, until we gave it another try, and got married a year later. I'm so glad I waited because when we first started dating, we were both trying to play the part of what we thought the other was looking for. We were 27 and 29, and although we felt mature, we still had a lot of growing up to do — personally, professionally, spiritually. By the time we gave it a second shot, in our mid-30s, we were completely ourselves — secure in our own skin, established in our careers, and with a clear view of what is most important to us." —Jaime, married at 36 "I waited to get married in my 30s because I wanted to live my life for me. I wanted to make sure I was able to accomplish all the things in life that I wanted to do. A lot of times when men and women marry young or in their 20s, they often put off their goals and dreams to start a family. I wanted to be fulfilled — I wanted to put myself first. Some may say that's selfish, but for me, that's knowing myself is what makes me happy. And I am so glad I waited. I am more mature, financially accomplished, and spiritually more stable. I know myself and love myself, which I had to do before I could appreciate a husband." —Melanie, married at 33
If it can happen to them then it can happen to you. So YES there is still hope.
Live your single on purpose, get yourself right, and believe that the right man will find you.
2. Single At 30 ~ Should You Be Worried?
NO, you should not be worried. I know it may seem like you are the only single 30 something woman out there but do not believe the hype that is not true. The fact of the matter is that fifty-two percent of 30-year-olds are married (source). Literally, there are about half of 30 something-year-old women who are not married. And if they are not worried then why should you be worried. Nothing about you being single and 30 is abnormal. It is normal to be single at the age of 30 as you can see the odds are about 50/50.
3. Single At 30 ~ What Were My Benefits
I told you that I was one of you and that I was single at 30. I got a degree, I got a Ph.D., I traveled, and I enjoyed my life. Most of all I got to get to know myself, upgrade my own status and the type of men that I would attract now is NOWHERE near the type of men that I would have dated in my 20s. The fact of the matter is that now more than ever is the dating pool gotten a lot better for me.
I am a career woman that is educated and is the type of man I attract. Out of all the boyfriends that I dated in my 20’s if I would have gotten married then I think I would have been on the way to happily divorced land. Instead of me seeing being single in my 30s as a horrid thing that has happened to me, I actually see it as a blessing.
In my 30’s is where I went from being a young immature woman to being on my grown woman status. I learn to be complete on my own instead of thinking that a man will complete me. Which I talk about in my video below on why it is important to level up.
“If you are waiting for someone to come in and complete your life, realize that you are complete on your own. You do not have to wait for anyone to do that for you.”
4. Single At 30 ~ What To Do
If you are single at 30 then do not just sit there like a bump on a log. Here are some things you can to make the most out of being single in your 30s:
- Go out and date. Find out where to meet great men in their 30s.
- You can go and live your dreams and make things happen on your own.
- Go back to school and get a degree or even several degrees.
- Travel more, when I was in my 20’s I stayed in some busted hotels. But I got older and more established my career I could do more travel that was more upscale and enjoyable because now I had the income.
- Upgrade yourself and your life. Make yourself more appealing to a higher caliber of guys.
- Climb the career ladder since you may not have time to do it once you are married.
Also, check out my video below on what to do while waiting and being single:
In case you are not getting the drift being single at 30 is like a big so what. It happens to a lot of women and there is no need to get depressed about it. Instead, live your life, be better, and if it really bothers you get more proactive about meeting men so you can change it.
If you know a fellow single woman that needs to read this post then feel free to share this post with her.
AND
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Amen !!! As single mom I wanted the man to validate and fix my life. Meanwhile God has already shown me that He is my maker and husband ( Isiaiah 5
4). I want to be free and live my life. Please keep writing it is very inspiring. Love from Htown, Tx.
Thanks so much for the comment. Girl I think we have all been there.